Archive for June, 2014

United States Shame

June 26, 2014

United States Shame.


United States Shame

June 26, 2014

A good friend of mine is dying, because decades ago he served in his country’s military. He was a Marine. We were young back then, but even the young knew we had no business trying to fight someone else’s civil war. And here we are again. No matter how many times you make the mistake, the result still hurts just as much. The loss, the suffering, the damage to the planet only get worse, because our technology has “improved.” It’s the very essence of shame.

I try the Serenity Prayer. And here we are again. Nothing has changed. He was sprayed with Agent Orange. Yes, the United States managed to use chemical weapons on its own. The United States, with the biggest arsenal of nuclear warheads in the world, the only country to ever use nuclear weapons against another country, looks for any excuse to get involved in anybody else’s war. Why? Because weapons sales support its economy, and money means more to those temporary government employees than life. So what’s so great about democracy, if there’s no social conscience?

The United States is cruel to its veterans. Does this not come under human rights? All my life I’ve waited for my country to clean up its own backyard, its racism, sexism, cruelty to the mentally ill and anyone the least bit different, including people with children forced out of their homes. I live in an ugly, cruel country, and I’m ashamed of its cruelty, because I used to work for my country. My country is full of ugly, hateful people. I managed to move to one of the nicest of the 50 states to get away from the madness, but now my friend is dying, and he can’t even get a copy of his own medical records from Veterans Affairs to take to his own private doctor. And he’s just one of so many.

So many have just come home from Afghanistan and Iraq that the Viet Nam vets have to wait for the younger ones to be processed first. HA! Not a good excuse, VA. The VA is just hoping that meanwhile the Viet Nam vets will die and the VA won’t have to take care of them. Meanwhile, President Obama sends more military “advisors” back into Iraq, which is how Viet Nam started.

When domestic abuse occurs in families, it tends to create a perpetuating cycle. It goes on forever if no one finds a way to break the cycle. PLEASE, GOD, SOMEONE FIND A WAY TO BREAK THE CYCLE!

Death of a Loved One

June 1, 2014

Death of a Loved One.

Death of a Loved One

June 1, 2014


People get hurt


When they’re not told the truth


When the facts are withheld


They’re left out of the loop




Not to be thought of


Inflicts greater pain


Than even hate




Especially within family


It feels like shame


To be left out




A life once shared


Since extinguished


Over a month ago


Without being told




If I’d known


If I’d known where he lived


While he did


I could have called




But I wasn’t part


Of my family


I would have liked to talk to him


I would have liked to have known




I kept the channels open


Or so I’d thought


They never said he’d moved back


They never said he was sick again




How do you write to your family


And talk about everything but


What’s important?




Was it intentional?


They didn’t want me to know?


I wasn’t considered close?


I didn’t deserve to be told?




If there’d been no communication


A lot could simply be unexplained


But I received false communication


A big lie now causing such pain




So I won’t try it again


They’re intentions are clear


I’m nothing to them




Loveless family is the most painful of all


It comes at me from all directions


The connections tenuous and strained


Though I’ve tried to keep the channels open




I have four family members by blood


There are no others anymore


And those who have dissed me need come no closer


There’s no answer for them at my door




I know he never forgot me


I don’t know why they pushed me aside


But I’m tired of those who verbally espouse “Christian” values


For show, for ego, for pride




I’m hurting


I’m forgotten


I’m not wanted in their lives




If love was ever there


It had only to be expressed


If only anyone had cared




People get hurt


And never recover


The relationships denied them




I grieve for the deaths


Of all involved—


Every one of them




Family meant a lot to me


Because it was preciously scarce


Family means nothing to shallow people


Who don’t reach beyond themselves




No one wants to be the one left out


No one wants to be forgotten


No one wants to be lied about behind their back


And know it’s a loveless marking




Life seems to me now to be a pattern


Of being forgotten and unwanted


But patterns persist where still is doubt


I’d hoped to be remembered




Maybe even loved


Doesn’t look like it’s to turn out


I’d have to have loving people who care


Four family members left




When I die will my friends be told?


Will anyone want to know?


If so, will they be blown off


Like they aren’t even loved?




People get hurt


By not being told




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